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| Jun 04 |
Archive for the 'Reviews' Category5 of the Most Ridiculous Deaths in Movie HistoryI asked the awesome Heather to list the five most ridiculous death scenes in her movie memory, and she did a hell of a job. My personal favorite is #4 from Wes Craven’s Deadly Friend. Check out the article below and keep an eye out for my list of my favorite ridiculous deaths to be posted next Friday. Enjoy!!! For a horror fan like myself who adores the over-the-top, campy, hilarious side of the genre, this was a very difficult list to narrow down. Ultimately, my choices are based not only on how laughable the scene is, but also how implausible, original, and well executed it is. 5. Street Trash (1987, J. Michael Muro) – “Toilet meltdown” Certainly not the only grotesque melting scene in cinema history, but definitely one of the most unique. Not only do we have a liquor that melts people but more specifically it turns hobos into fluorescently-colored piles of goo. In this famous scene, the first unfortunate bum to imbibe “Viper” melts into a dirty, abandoned toilet. The rubbery face that emerges from the bowl at the end is the peak of this scene’s ridiculousness. And it gets bonus ridiculous points for all the unnecessary Raimi-esque camera movements. Street Trash is chock full of colorful (har har) moments like this one, so if you haven’t already seen it, do so immediately. 4.Deadly Friend (1986, Wes Craven) – “Deadly basketball” Two years after A Nightmare on Elm Street, Wes Craven made this corny little gem about a killer Kristy Swanson. If you never watch this movie, okay, I don’t blame you. But everybody should watch the basketball scene at least once. Actually, you won’t be able to stop at just once. Yes, it’s the cheesy, gory equivalent of a Lay’s potato chip. Watch, and behold the deadliest basketball ever. Bonus ridiculous points for Anne Ramsey (or as you know her, “that mean old woman from Goonies”) and her very premature scream. 3.Hausu (1977, Nobuhiko Obayashi) – “Piano food” This whole damn movie is ridiculous, but if I have to narrow down one amazingly crazy death scene – and the lampshade scene is a close second – I have to give it to death-by-piano. As if the concept of being devoured by a piano isn’t ridiculous enough, this entire scene is off-the-charts absurd. There are goldfish, cats, lightening, and my personal favorite, a dancing skeleton. I love how the piano eats the girl’s fingers first, which amuses her, but when it eats her hand, oh no, that’s too much. And just when you think this can’t get any weirder…well, I won’t spoil it. 2.Dead Alive/Braindead (1992, Peter Jackson) Choosing just one ridiculous death scene from this movie is like picking a favorite child. Everything about this movie is over-the-top and wonderful. The clip provided here includes ten must-see minutes from the film’s ending. My choice for most awesomely ridiculous death arrives at 4:20 where Rita bites it. Herein, two tiny arms sprout from each side of her head and proceed to rip her face open to reveal a giggling zombie baby, who then walks her corpse around like a puppet. Is Peter Jackson making a twisted metaphor of child birth? Who knows what goes on in that sick brain. Can you believe they let this guy make Lord of the Rings? I love it. 1.Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky (1991, Lam Ngai Kai) Here is another movie that is beginning-to-end ridiculous in the best possible way. The titular character destroys his enemies in increasingly outlandish, gory ways. He punches a hole in someone’s stomach, shatters hands with his fist, and literally punches a guy’s jaw off his face. But my favorite death scene comes when Ricky fights Oscar, the prison warden’s beloved fighter. First, Ricky knocks his eyeball out with a light slap. Oscar, ashamed and beaten, harakiri’s himself but before dying decides to strangle Ricky with his intestines. Amazing. The fatal blow isn’t quite as awesome, but a sweet Sonny Chiba reference all the same. Riki-Oh took #1 on my list for packing an impressive amount of ridiculousness into 91 minutes. This is one film I will never, ever tire of watching.
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| Feb 02 |
Archive for the 'Reviews' CategoryJohnny Vengeance 2.0 #1- Edge of Darkness Review |
| Jun 30 |
Archive for the 'Reviews' CategoryDVD Releases For June 30th 20091. Street Fighter : The Legend of Chun Li What’s good about it: Nothing really. Yes Kristin Kreuk is impossibly hot, but unless you’re a huge fan of wirework stunts and cheesy martial arts flicks you won’t find much here. What’s bad about it: Everything you could possibly imagine. The characters are shallow, the script is lazy, the direction is standard at best, and sadly they even leave room for a sequel. Not that it’s likely to get made. Bottom Line: Don’t rent it. Don’t buy it. Don’t even look at the dvd. Well maybe look at the dvd. Kreuk is still amazing to look at. Which is why chose the pic above instead of the awful movie poster. 2. 12 Rounds
12 Rounds is essentially the same film as Die Hard 3. Protagonist (John Cena) kills someone close to antagonist, in this case by accident. Antagonist (Aiden Gillen) comes back years later to exact revenge by putting protagonist through a series of rigorous tests and “games” keeping the entire police force busy while antagonist steals truckloads of money. What’s good about it: You guessed it, not much. Renny Harlin has never been bad at putting an action sequence together, and there are some decent ones here but nothing you haven’t seen before. What’s bad about it: The wooden acting, derivative material, and uninspired direction. Bottom Line: Be glad they didn’t rehire Harlin to direct Die Hard 3, because this is what we would have ended up with. If you’ve seen more than a few action movies, you’ve seen this film. Stay away. Very far away. 3.Tokyo! Three talented directors (Michel Gondry, Jooh-ho Bong, Leos Carax) tell three very different stories all involving one city. Tokyo! What’s good about it: Gondry’s segment “Interior Design” is beautifully shot and acted. It’s likely my favorite. Joon-ho Bong’s “Shaking Tokyo” is a quirky, fun, and atmospheric love story involving a junk collector and a pizza delivery girl. What’s bad about it: Leos Carax’s “Merde” segment isn’t exactly bad, but it’s certainly the weakest link in the group. While it’s well shot, Merde, seems to try the patience of it’s viewers in the last act. The Bottom Line: If you own a Blu-Ray player this is worth buying. It’s scenes of Tokyo as seen through the eyes of these directors are absolutely awesome. |
| Jun 28 |
Archive for the 'Reviews' CategoryForgotten Films Numero Uno: Blue Thunder
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| Feb 24 |
Archive for the 'Reviews' CategoryThree Steven Sodebergh Movies You Probably Haven’t Seen |
| Feb 24 |
Archive for the 'Reviews' CategoryA Glowing (sort of) review of Watchmen
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| Feb 17 |
Archive for the 'Reviews' CategoryAgainst the Drunk: NSFWAgainst the Drunk is our first attempt at a drunken movie review and commentary. It’s a bit chaotic and a little incoherent but stick with it they’ll get better as time goes by. This weeks movie is Steven Seagal’s Against The Dark. The movie takes place in the not too distant future where the world has been ravaged by a virus that turns people into vampire/zombies. Seagal plays a government sanctioned “hunter” who leads a team to clear out the worst infected areas. When he stumbles upon a group of survivors in a run down hospital they discover that the infected may be “evolving” and things could be worse than they seem. I promise the movie is actually much worse than it sounds. * I have more outtakes to post soon as well. One of which includes my roomie Sam wander into the Vlog half naked, drunk and with partially bleached hair. He didn’t realize we were shooting a blog |
| Feb 02 |
Archive for the 'Reviews' CategoryPhonte’s Movie in a Minute: Seven PoundsI don’t know if it’s in bad form to post another video blog other than my own, but Phonte’s break down of Seven Pounds is honest, and down right hysterical, so it had to be done. Be warned there are spoilers, and this is likely not safe for your work place. Enjoy anyway, and you can find more of his Movie in a Minute on You Tube. He’s a funny guy, check him out. *Thanks to Phil for posting it on his Facebook, which is where I found it. |
| Jan 19 |
Archive for the 'Reviews' CategoryA Good Romantic Comedy?I know it’s hard to believe, but I’m going to promote a romantic comedy. Before you yank my geek card and tell me I’m lame, hear me out. The film, 500 Days of Summer, has a great cast, and by great I mean the ridiculously cute and talented Zooey Deschanel and one of my favorite young actors Joseph Gordon-Levitt. If you haven’t seen Gordon-Levitt’s work in Brick or Mysterious Skin put it on your netflix queue now or I’ll punch you in the throat. Those to actors alone should be enough reason to watch any film. But if you need more convincing watch the trailer below. The film released July 24th. Enjoy. * Throatpunch |
| Dec 30 |
Archive for the 'Reviews' CategoryThe Good, The Bad, and The WeirdI’ve just had the pleasure of watching Ji-Woon Kim’s ultra-violent western The Good, The Bad and The Weird. I can’t recommend it enough. The film is full of inspired action sequences, clever homages, and some downright ridiculous moments. The film’s official US release date via IFC films is February 6th 2009. It’s unclear yet if IFC will offer it as part of their on-demand library or not. Either way, rush to the theater to see this movie. It’s without a doubt in my top 10 of 2008. If you haven’t already seen the trailer. Check it out below. This movie kicks so much ass that if any of you wanted to see it early I might able to be persuaded into a viewing party. |
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